The Tale Of The Horse's Ass

Former FEMA and Arabian Horse Assocation Director Michael Brown, looking rested and ready, alert and assertive, appeared today before the sparsely populated House Committee investigating the federal response to hurricane Katrina.

So, what went wrong down there?

Instantly Brown demonstrated the kind of clear-visioned, supremely focused, steely vision that was the hallmark of his leadership.

He admitted there were a few slipups on his part, negligible, but a few. However, Brown said, look--- this was the heart of it all: “I very strongly personally regret that I was unable to persuade Governor Blanco and Mayor Nagin to sit down, get over their differences and work together.” Brown, leaning firmly forward in his seat told the representatives, "I just couldn't pull that off."

It quickly became clear that Brown has used these weeks of D-C dungeon downtime to gain a true perspective that will help move us forward and avoid the kind of unnecessary deaths and lingering homelessness we are still seeing. It was not him, certainly not the President, and clearly not FEMA that failed. Oh, no.

So who was to blame?

Ah, the fault to properly call in the cavalry, to race to the rescue of the displaced, the distressed, and the dead lay with the blubbery Louisiana Governor and the needy New Orleans Mayor.

Brown testified, "My biggest mistake was not recognizing by Saturday that Louisiana was dysfunctional."

Oh man, if only those, those, politicians had not been there none of this would have happened.

But wait, ladies and gentleman--- there’s more.

Brown continues to do a hell of a lot better than the folks along the Gulf Coast. Turns out that the new, reorganized FEMA itself, eager to make sure they don’t lose a second of these precious insights from Brown, has made sure to fire him, but at the same time to keep him on the payroll. CBS news reporter Gloria Borger says Brown is a fully paid “contractor,” while he is “transitioning out of his job.” FEMA, says Borger, told her “ the agency wants to get what it calls the "proper download of his (Brown’s) experience."

Not that they could have simply insisted he tell them whatever he knew for free. Oh no, for sure not. And jesus god, they actually think he knew anything.

Then, what’s this term, “proper download,” applied to a human being mean--- in English?

Stands to reason that since we have FEMA spokespeople who can’t speak in any language on this planet how can we expect they will ever truly understand a simple call for help?